


Ocean

by pinkheichou



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon Compliant, Feels, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Ocean, loving bbies, my bbies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2018-10-20
Packaged: 2019-08-04 23:33:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16356422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkheichou/pseuds/pinkheichou
Summary: “So this is it?” Armin startled and held a stark composure, blinking to erase any evidence of having almost started crying. He had had enough of it. Showing his emotional side to his captain, his lover.





	Ocean

**Author's Note:**

> because ao3 needs more Rivarmin (and no one can tell me otherwise)

The sea air buzzed against his skin. Here, Armin could mentally dive into the cleansing saltiness of the ocean, listen to the crashes of the waves on the shore and forget everything else, come to peace with himself for a second, a minute, an hour, a day even—if he had it especially bad.

He wouldn’t bring someone else with him, just solitude. The sun was breaching the horizon, the horizon was tipping the sun in an apricot colour. It was summer, the sun set later, Armin didn’t know how long he’d lingered here, but it didn’t seem to have been long enough.

He breathed in deeply, the air shattering through his lungs unevenly, as though he was swallowing hard rocks, and when he exhaled he felt like crying in silence.

“So this is it?” Armin startled and held a stark composure, blinking to erase any evidence of having almost started crying. He had had enough of it. Showing his emotional side to his captain, his lover.

They had to focus on missions too meaningful to give in for a moment and spill tears. There was the outside world. The Marleyans. Also, Armin had that odd sensation that there was something up with Eren. But he couldn’t put a finger on what it was. At least not yet.

Armin didn’t give a retort, conceding in biting his bottom lip, almost in vast and exposed shame.

Levi continued, “So this is what you’re doing when I can’t find you anywhere and you’d tell me afterwards that you were outside taking some fresh air? You ride off  _all the way_  to the ocean? Every time?”

Levi’s firm but soothing steps reached the back of Armin. Armin sensed it and hunched up his shoulders.

“There’s no other place I can feel better.”

“Not even when you’re with me?”

Armin remained silent.

“Armin?”

“You’re a captain. I can’t occupy your time as a like just because I need some consolation. I promised myself to never be a burden again.”

“You aren’t a burden. Never.”

Armin kept silent. His shoulders quivered inconspicuously. His voice sounded frail when he said,

“Sometimes I need a place where I can let everything out. The burde—”

“Stop.” Levi stood by his statement from just now and Armin should keep that in mind. Because after the few years of being together, Levi found out that Armin had the habit of convincing himself of being a certain way and it took quite some talks and reassurances until he would drop those bad assumptions of himself.

Armin got Levi’s intervention and tried it another way. “The stress. The exhaustion that wasn’t physical. The responsibility we have to face now. Coming here to the ocean is like a catharsis to me. Even if…” Armin swallowed the lump in his throat. “Even if I know now that the ocean doesn’t end in something peaceful, something bright, on the other side.”

Levi laid a steady hand on Armin’s shoulder and turned his lover slowly around. Levi came to face with eyes darted to the floor, teeth firmly holding his bottom lip at place, turning white where they dug into, and red blotches decorated his face.

Armin was at such an unease, it pained Levi’s chest, letting it squirm and mewl.

“Remember when we became a couple and you asked me whether it was really fine for me? And I said it is and I’d be there for you when you need me? Armin,” Levi raised Armin’s right hand to the height level of their chests, his fingers parting Armin’s, slipping in, two hands having become a threaded construction of pure love. “You don’t have to go through this alone. I’m here for you. I’ve told myself that I would always take care of you. You don’t have to cry in secret anymore. The pain. Let me see and let me heal.”

It took some seconds, but at last Armin nodded awkwardly, mind a bit intricate, and droplets of tears spilled over as he moved his head up and down. It ceased in Armin crying with almost no voice, however not holding back.

Levi, caring and understanding, placed a genuine kiss on Armin’s forehead and guided him by his shoulders to his chest. He hugged him as a hand wandered up to caress blond hair. His lips left a trail of kisses of promised recovery on Armin’s temple and heated cheek and neck.

The ocean’s waves played their natural music as the lovers allowed themselves a highly precious and intimate moment.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: [pinkheichou](http://www.pinkheichou.tumblr.com)


End file.
